with friends on the edge of a silent and empty city.  it’s like chicago, but some parallel version of it.  it’s almost time for them to leave and we lament that none of us went for a swim.  so i jump in the canal/river and laugh about how nice it is to swim. but as i look up the skies are changing and a storm is moving in.  i swim toward a tunnel that leads out into the sea/lake michigan fearing that once the wind picks up it will carry me with the current away from my friends.  the tunnel out to sea is almost entirely underwater and so i have to hold my breath in the darkness until i get to the other side.  when i open my eyes and look up i see the sky, but the clouds are waves frozen mid-crest and i still cannot breathe. i am dangerously close to being sucked back into the tunnel. i reach my arm up through the semi-solid mist of sea-level clouds before blacking out and my friends grab my hand to pull me to safety.
in a car with my mom.  i am going over her insurance paperwork.  she needs so much treatment and she had finally been promoted to full-time. but that is another stress because it means she no longer qualifies for free healthcare and if she has to take time off for treatment she might lose her job.  i tell her to lie on the forms.  i tell her to only put that she is working part-time.  she hasn’t received a full-time check yet so they won’t know the difference.
at PSG in some place like oregon and ireland combined.  minerva complains about her knees and i offer to take an extra work shift.  we talk about how this year is so different, we haven’t done any of the things we usually do.  i tell her that i haven’t even walked across the grassy ridge to admire the landscape like i usually do.  everything is so very green and wet and soft there.  i go to work the food truck. we are making food that is free to anyone who can’t afford to eat. we encourage everyone to come and sit together and enjoy a hot meal.  but the food doesn’t really make sense.  one dish is a loaf of french bread in a casserole dish covered in potato chips.  the people love it.  i’m not moving as quickly as i should because i can only find small appetizer plates in the disorganized cabinets.  finally i find a large plate to serve someone. there’s only one large plate left in there and i’m grateful when another volunteer arrives to help serve everyone.