swimming in the ocean. my dad has already taken jaimie skydiving or paragliding or something and something had gone wrong and she was injured/traumatized but mostly ok. then he takes us out into he ocean to this huge tugboat or something. like a big ass yacht but it only has a an open frame and rows upon rows of seats for sightseeing. he says we’re going on a trip and wants jaimie to get on first. but the boat is very obviously on fire. the steering wheel is poking out of flames. and she looks like she’s going to get on and i yell that she can’t that none of us are getting on this fucking boat. the fire is getting bigger and it starts popping below the surface of the water and i know it’s going to explode so i tell everyone to swim as fast as they can to get away. reluctantly my dad agrees and it blows up. twice. so there was some sort of explosive on there. we go back to our lodge and there are donuts to make up for our lost tour. there are chocolate donuts with caramel and coconut drizzled on top. they are the first to go, of course. i don’t actually eat one. my little sister gets one. then she falls asleep on the bench. did i mention she’s like 8? yeah. and smaller than she was at 8. i pick her up and let her lay her head on my lap. she isn’t feeling good, can’t stay awake. i ask her if there is anything we can get for her and play with her hair. she says she just wants another donut. my dad jumps up and says he knows where to find them. the chocolate on with the coconut, right? and then i fearfully realize that it’s possible that my dad is trying to kill my sister. that everything he does for/with her turns to disaster. and the donuts were gone, but he can get more? they must be poisoned. in the same but different dream i am trying to figure out the quickest way to get through a crowd, going down stairs with hannah, hoping she doesn’t poop and it’s dark and everyone is coming from a concert and there’s chain link fences everywhere. then i am home and i go up the stairs which are my grandparents’ stairs and i find brett and i ask him, where is hannah? and he tells me that she’s outside. i ask her how long she’s been out there and he says about 4 hours. 4 HOURS?! she can’t be out there for more than 40 minutes! i look out to my grandparents back yard and it’s covered in inches of snow. we get her inside and it’s grotesque. her whole left back leg and hip are bare and raw and cracked. she won’t even move that leg it’s so frozen. her skin is cracked in other places, her ears can’t be touched for fear of them coming off. she has to be in so much pain warming up. i’m angry and crying for her, i don’t know what to do for her. but brett just holds her and she lets him wrap her up in his sweater as he goes back to his video game and he tells me “see she’s fine.”